Sunday, June 15, 2008

Thanks Dad

My Dad is an interesting guy. Not prototypical in a lot of ways. Never a big pusher. Never the enforcer in our family. But always my Dad.

My Dad never laid a hand on me my entire life. Odd set of circumstances until you look deeper. My Dad's real father took a hike when he was 6 months old. Left him and his Mother homeless in Terre Haute, Indiana. She remarried six months later to a man that would haunt his his adolesence.

The step-father was a cruel man who meted out both physical and mental punishment in abundance. He was a drunk. My Dad doesn't really go into details about the physical abuse, but I heard about the black eyes and him getting out of the house when his step father had been drinking. He would sleep at a friends houses. He was simply hated because his was the son of another man who had been with his wife prior to their meeting.

The one glimpse that I was given on something that hurt my father deeply was when he was 6 or 7 years old. His step father had told him that they were going to see the Indianapolis 500 in person. This was a big deal back in the day. My father sat outside from 7 am till 9pm waiting for a ride that never came.

Despite this challenging set of circumstances I have never doubted for one second that my father loved me. One proof of his love was that he wasn't the parent that spanked. He did not want to go there. The worst form of punishment that my father would dish out to me was the expression that stated, "you have disappointed me."

He, despite early working hours, always had time for a catch in the backyard. Did he go to all my games in high school and college? No. But he went to my Little League games without fail. Most importantly, he instilled in me a love of baseball and a respect for its tradition that continues to this day. It is still a thread in our relationship.

So thanks Dad for stopping the cycle of pain and hurt. That could have been passed on to me but you made a decision that the cycle would end with you. You are a complex guy who grew up in times of blood and trauma. Despite these challenges, all you have ever shown me is love. Oh, I would be remiss if I didn't thank you for a million laughs along the way.

I love you Dad.

2 comments:

Kimala said...

Our world - mine and our kids' - would not be the same without Grandpa Bobby :) Hoo!

Me said...

Awww.

:) You're a lucky man, BigD.